Facebook Says Public Breastfeeding is Obscene

nofacebookFacebook bans breastfeeding photos, in case you’ve missed all the hullabaloo lately. Is public breastfeeding really obscene? Facebook seems to think so. At least, posting photos of nursing your child can get you removed from Facebook altogether. AllFacebook.com reported Monday that Facebook warned user Heather Farley to remove a photo of her breastfeeding her child. Farley emailed Facebook requesting an explanation.

“When Facebook didn’t respond to Farley’s email, she posted another photo and was threatened by Facebook to have her account deleted. This is when things got ugly—for Facebook, at least. Once Farley went public with her complaint against Facebook, stating that she felt bullied. So she protested.”

Facebook users posting breastfeeding photos like Farley have been warned to remove the “offensive” photos or risk losing their Facebook account. At the time of this posting, 83,000+ Facebook users have joined the Hey, Facebook, breastfeeding is not obscene! group to petition Facebook to stop harassing users with breastfeeding photos and to possibly change their TOS (terms of service) to make room for these motherly expressions.

There’s a much larger issue at stake here. One which neither Farley nor Facebook have the power to change. But the handling of this online situation and the attention it will bring could at least make the public aware of the issue on a level that is more open and honest than you’ll get by hearing some random bitter person’s opinion at the local Starbucks.

Why do people react so strongly to public breastfeeding? What is REALLY at issue here?

Sexual Confusion
Men and women alike have abysmally poor role models in their parents, extended family, and teachers. Men are taught by example to view breasts as a intensely sexual parts of the female body. They are one of the hottest visual hotspots on a woman. Many men face a sort of sexual confusion when their wives or girlfriends first breastfeed a baby. These parts of the body that were once dedicated solely to gratify their sexual desire now give off a very non-sexual, motherly vibe, and the men go into shock. That whole oedipal thing still hasn’t gotten sorted out by the male gender, and reminders that the very object of our highest affection is not really ours, but a highly functional and amazing tool for feeding and comforting children has some of us all out of sorts.

Many childless women (and some mothers) react much the same way. They have been taught by the fashion magazines, Hollywood, high school, and all of American culture to view their breasts as male magnets. Women are taught by example to identify with their bodies in a singular, sexual fashion, rather than in the simultaneously dualistic sexual/motherly/nurturing fashion.

Simply put, public breastfeeding is a slap in the face of American glam culture, centered around airbrushing, Photoshop, yoga-like contortions, and expensive lighting. We are earthy, natural creatures after all, and no amount of denial and avoidance will change that fact. Everyone trying to look, act, and live like they have the perfect enviable life want nothing to do with what they consider to be the basest of human functions. But we are doing ourselves a grave disservice to look down on public nursing as something crude, obscene, or improper. Breastfeeding is one of the most miraculous processes known to humanity, involving scientific and psychological marvels you haven’t even imagined yet.

On the other hand, there is something a bit artificial about a woman’s insistence on showing her baby nursing in a photo. What is the point? Someone said that it’s no different than showing a photo of your baby drinking from a bottle. Okay. I understand that perspective. But I don’t want to see a photo of a baby drinking a bottle either. You don’t need a photo of me with a forkload of spaghetti in my mouth, do you?

This is where we need to find balance. The REAL issue is whether a woman breastfeeding in the line of sight of others is obscene and improper, to which I must decidedly say no, it isn’t. It is good, healthy, and natural for a woman to nurse. A woman dedicated to nursing her child has every right to participate in the events of life, and should not be banished from the world because she takes the time and effort to feed her baby with the most nutritious and emotionally comforting food possible.

Still, what’s with the photos? I don’t get it. In the real world, I can notice a woman breastfeeding and decide not to stare and ogle her in a sexual way. When I visit your Facebook profile, your pic is staring me in the face and saying, “See! My breast! Look at it! Look at it, but don’t think of it as you would normally think of a breast.” Then again, maybe my personal understanding of breasts is still far too limited. Perhaps I need an awakening. Perhaps we all need a Breastfeeding Renaissance.

Let me break this down into the simplest possible way I know how:

We should be VERY cautious to relegate wholesome, intimate, natural, healthy, and beneficial parts of humanity into something less… something repulsive. If you want to show your breast in a nursing photo, be my guest. But I don’t want to visit your page because I don’t need to look at it. However, you who look in disdain at women loving their babies the most natural way possible ought to be ashamed of yourselves. Get a clue. A woman does not deserve to be punished for being a good mother. And public ridicule, disgust, or contempt are unnaceptable displays of cruelty towards this, our most sacred act of nurturing life and the hope of our tomorrow.

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  • WrapYourBaby
    To be fair, if you posted a pic of yourself with a forkful of food in your mouth, I just wouldn't care to look at it--I certainly wouldn't be offended! There are all kinds of pics that my friends post that I'm not interested in. Such is life.

    The reason why some of us want to post pictures of our babies nursing is 1) beautiful pictures and 2) because until breastfeeding is normalized, mothers are put off of the best thing they can give their babies!

    We're nursing for all humanity, and we're doing it in public for humanity too!

    Thanks for the good post!
  • Guest
    It's funny, on majority of these facebook breastfeeding pages, the women are big on scolding other mothers for how they raise their kids. Then these same woman post the least modest photos of themselves breastfeeding and then get upset when they are removed.

    Facebook has rules regarding what they consider nudity and these women do not follow these rules. Then these same women have the nerve to complain stating that girls in bikinis show more skin on Facebook. To be fair, the girls in bikinis keep their breasts and nipples covered.

    One woman posted breastfeeding photos of herself feeding her son IN A DOG CAGE with her nipples exposed. Seriously, WHY on earth would you post a picture like that! Have some common sense! Women like the dog cage woman are the ones who insult other breastfeeding moms who ask the simple question of why not have some modesty when posting these pics.
  • a person
    it's kind of gross
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